Between Parent and Child

image from amazon.com

Just a quick shout out to the best parenting book I've read in a long time!  I used to tear through parenting books, finding purpose and vision in my calling as a mother.  Then, I took a hiatus...maybe I got a little prideful not thinking I needed to read them anymore. And then I had teenagers and was not prepared for the transition.  After a great discussion with my dearest friend I felt inspired to get to reading some more.  This was the first book I picked up and loved every minute of it! 

A couple of quotes: 

"Children whose parents do not consider their feelings and point of view may conclude that their ideas are stupid and unworthy of attention and that they are neither lovable nor loved (p.84)." 

"Emotions are part of our genetic heritage. Fish swim, birds fly, and people feel.  Sometimes we are happy, sometimes we are not; but sometimes our lives are sure to feel anger and fear, sadness and joy, greed and guilt, lust and scorn, delight and disgust.  While we are not free to choose the emotions that arise in us, we are free to choose how we express them, provided we know what they are...Many people have been educated out of knowing what their feelings are.  When they felt hate, they were told it was only dislike.  When they were afraid, they were told there was nothing to be afraid of.  When they felt pain, they were advised to be brave and smile (p.27)."

The last couple of years I feel I have become more of a manager than a mother. Dictating became my #1 form of communication with my children.  Dictating, managing, scheduling...this does not create a relationship with others.  This book gave me a glimpse of how better to connect with my children; it's helped me to think about them as people with feelings, not as my children who need to be taught and trained all of the time.  

Looking for motivation in your role as a mother?  I recommend this book!